No problem

I was definitely in a weird, gloomy mood towards the end of last semester. School was a drag, I had concerns about the internship, I missed the States incredibly, and I was bummed at the thought of 4 more years of school (one year undergrad, 3 years graduate). Basically I felt everything had stalled.

Being home for a week with plenty of time to think has helped me a lot. One thing that had bothered me was the idea of working my way up the ranks within an architecture firm. The lack of independence and control goes against my nature. But I know there are a lot of things to learn when I start working. Architecture is a field where experience almost matters more than education, and a humble start is something every architect goes through.

Another thing I've realized there is no ideal job. Maybe a rather obvious observation...but throughout my life, I've basically heard two mantras: "Follow your dreams and do what makes you happy" and "Every job will become boring, even if you try to follow your dreams" (guess which one is my dad's favorite saying). But I don't think there is one or the other. I don't believe in the "ideal person" so why do people stress about the "ideal job"? It's just a matter of matching up your interests as much as possible and working through any difficulties.

So I will be going back to Shanghai with more optimism. The assignment I got from the office over break is a little tedious, but it's allowing me to read about a lot of architects I didn't know about. I'm still looking for another job and have plans to volunteer if that falls through. Four more months of (relative) freedom to explore and work on my own projects. I'm pretty lucky.